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Purification Rituals - IG Post


Purification is making something spiritually or ceremonially clean, which can also mean removing containments from something. Someone may extend their purification ritual beyond their own body to the spaces they will inhabit/use. These rituals may be done alone or with others. The idea of purification rituals practiced in non-monogamy could set off red flags for some people. Before offering judgment, one must ask why the action is happening and who is responsible for completing it.

Those who practice purification rituals may be moved to do so because of their spiritual or religious affiliation. They may be required before they can enter specific spaces or be with their partners. Also, seeing something as impure does not inherently mean it lacks worth. It may translate to simply a natural state before purification in which they can access a location or person.

Between Partners

Purification rituals may happen between partners, which may be something the person decides for themself or a practice expected by their partner(s). If a partner resides in space before another returns or visits, there might be a purification ritual. If someone does not like to mix their spiritual, physical, and/or emotional energy between partners, there may be a purification ritual. If someone is transitioning between casual encounters and intimate partners, there may be a purification ritual.


"Exposure" can be anything - a person, a person they are not emotionally attached to, a person or location with negative energy, etc. Some people may practice some form of a purification ritual after exposure to something they consider an outside source or containment. This purification may be done directly after exposure or later on. They may do this before entering protected areas in their home (like a bedroom or bed). This may differ between partners as it may be strictly for their own practice and peace.


  • burning herbs, salt, holy or anointed oils, purified or charged water, etc. being used to cleanse an area or person - It can also look like using Florida water on a floor crossed by someone

  • spiritual herb baths, taking baths/showers, ritualistic hand, foot, hair washing - can look like going into bodies of moving water to cleanse

  • changing the sheets, glasses, and silverware, or general setting between the arrival/changing of partners

BDSM & Kink

Some people in non-monogamy may live a 24/7 (or practice) BDSM and k-nk lifestyle. There is something referred to as protocol (high protocol), loosely defined as a set of activities, rituals, and procedures that can be formal and strictly enforced by those participating in that dynamic, house*, or event location. Some people who identify as M/D/s may still practice protocol even if they are not in a dynamic. With that said, some protocol includes some purification rituals.

The Goal

Everyone's goal for the purification ritual could be different. For some, the purification could allow them to feel cleansed and ready to experience their partners, themselves*, their safe spaces, and/or spiritual practices. For others - it may be a form of apotheosis (divinization or deification) necessary for their spirituality and transcends their partners.

Your Choice

As with all things, it is your choice whether or not you will participate in a purification ritual. That is an issue if you cannot consent to a purification ritual (your partner "cleansing" you while you sleep or your items). If purification rituals are important to you to practice, let your partners know if they will be affected by said rituals. Burning sage or smoking a purification herb may be a good idea in a shared space until you trigger respiratory problems in a partner. Consent is paramount.

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